would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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