I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
