so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
