She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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