I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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