Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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