Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
