he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
