She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
