her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize