i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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