What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
