If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize