Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
