We're facebook friends in real life
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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