Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize