I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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