Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
