We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize