What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
