So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Randomize