is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
