i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize