Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
