its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
