You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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