he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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