This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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