I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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