It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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