: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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