help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Congratulations! We have a period
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
