Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Green mimosas i think yes
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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