i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
her facebook's as public as her vagina
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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