Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
