I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
