Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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