I need help removing her.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
You made out with two different species that night
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
