Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Randomize
