idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
