Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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