i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
i out mim tonsoeep
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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