Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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