hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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