best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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