Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
that is very illegal...i love you.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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