it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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