So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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