She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
so much tequila, so little girl.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
