wake up i wanna do it froggy style
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
